hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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