it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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