At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
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