i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
