she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
