You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
These tits shall not be calmed
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
