i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
We're using joints as your birthday candles
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
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