U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
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