How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize