Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize