Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize