Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Randomize
