She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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