thus making me awesome and them whores
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Randomize
