your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
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