This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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