Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
You're my little dorito
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.