Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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