fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
