I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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