I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
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