Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
