Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
