i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
