P.S. I can't hear my feet
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
