I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
