Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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