Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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