It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
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I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
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then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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