brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
