I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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