we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
