I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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