Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Randomize
