Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
And then the night went full on bisexual.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
