I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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