woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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