I think scott just propositioned me for sex
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
