please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
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I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
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I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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