How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
