let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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