You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize
