evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I think I just sharted jello shots
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