I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
