I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
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Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
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You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I think my nap took me to another dimension
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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