our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
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