so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
