you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
