I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
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