who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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